Lessons From the Desert: 6 Things to Remember This Lent

1. Go BIG or go Home

by Paddie Denton

When it comes to Lent, I've learned that if I don't challenge myself and fully commit to this time of growth, it's just not worth it.  So, each year I push myself further (It’s worrying to think of what I am going to have to give up when I'm 50 if I keep this up each year). However, I’ve learnt that every year, before I can commit to any challenge, I need to ask ‘how do I want to grow?’ To answer this, I may ask myself ‘do I need to overcome a particular vice?’ Or ‘do I need to grow in prayer?’ Or ‘do I need to learn to love more?’ By praying with these questions, I learn where my Lenten challenge lies. When it comes to Lent this year, my advice is this: work out the virtue you need to grow in, and then think ‘how can I best use these 40 days to accomplish that?’ Go deep, go big, and commit. That is my challenge to you.

2. Challenge, Persevere, and Build

by Benedict Hince

Over the years, Lent has brought with it many different intrigues for me. From the family television vanishing when I was a child – without consultation I might add! – to the strict imposition of soup Wednesday's and Friday's whilst living in community. But if I could offer a lesson that I have learnt through them all it would be this:

Challenge yourself! Find something that will be a real sacrifice for YOU! Not something that you think would be hard for others, but something that is going to challenge you personally. That's Point 1. Point 2: Don't get down in the dumps when you fail – which, if you've followed Point 1, is kind of inevitable. Get back up and soldier on! And point 3: Add something. Lent isn’t just about what you’re getting rid of, it's about what you're taking up too – so find something to add into your daily routine that is going to help you to build up the Kingdom of God.

3. To Be Filled, We Must Be Empty

by Megan James

I remember when I was young, before any birthday, my mum would make me have a good tidy of my room, and go through all my clothes and toys to de-clutter all those things I just didn’t need any more. Every year she would tell me ‘you’re making room for the presents you’re going to get!’ But still, giving away those trainers with the snazzy lights that flashed (that I insisted I could still fit my hobbit feet in) was, well, tough for little old me. However, my mum was right (I hope she doesn’t read this…), de-cluttering every year really did give me so much more room, and sure enough, I was blessed every year with bigger and better presents that were much more suitable to where I was in life (y’know, instead of me squeezing my clearly too big feet into a pair of velcro trainers, no matter how cool they were). 

This is Lent. 

Just as I had to empty my room of what I thought were my essentials to receive those wonderful presents, we too have to empty ourselves to receive the gift of God. 
Last Lent, I realised that I needed to stop seeing fasting just as what I was giving up, or what I was missing out on, but instead, I needed to see that when I fast, I am simply making room in my life and my soul. This room that we all make during Lent is a room that God will delight and thrive in. Just as my mum each year would refill my wardrobe or toybox with things that she knew would be better suited to me than the old things I clung to, our Father wants to do the same. God will take all that we offer Him, all those things that we have out grown or that we have depended on for too long, and He will use them to transform us into who He has planned us to be, replacing them with Himself, and giving us more than we could ever hope for. So don't cling onto things and think about how much you're going to miss them when you're fasting, instead empty yourself, and look forward to the space God is about to step in and fill.

“Thou must be emptied of that wherewith thou art full, that thou mayest be filled with that whereof thou art empty.” – St. Augustine

4. Be Realistic, Not Drastic

by Eleanor Hill

A Lent that really stands out to me was when I decided to do something that wasn’t as challenging as some of my other Lenten promises (and trust me, I’ve had some big ones). Instead, this one was something that I knew would simply bring me closer to God. One year, I just decided to be silent in prayer for 10 minutes each day, and made sure I went to Mass twice a week.  Don’t get me wrong, some days I struggled, but for me, it was never as hard as doing something other people may find easy, like giving up those snacks that I needed to get me through tough days at the library. 

My point is this: it's about being realistic with yourself, and not being drastic just for the sake of it. This Lent, don’t run before you can walk.  When you pick your Lenten promise, make a promise to God that, first of all, has the intention of bringing you closer to him, and secondly, that is a healthy and realistic challenge. The simple Lenten promise I made of 10 minutes silent prayer each day, despite the big promises I have made in the past, is probably still the only promise that has had a lasting effect on my relationship with God, and it went above and beyond the 40 days I signed up for. 

So, be realistic, not drastic. Remember; God will use anything and everything for his glory if you let him, so give him what you can and he will absolutely delight and run with it. My 10 minutes of silence a day to God is just as powerful as someone else’s 40 days on bread and water.

5. Keep Your Pride In Check 

by Emily Milne

One Lent a few years back, I was super proud of what I was giving up. I thought it made me just the best Christian ever to do what I was doing. And you can bet that I made sure I told everyone about it. One day, my brother had had enough, and basically told me to pipe down, in front of my parents and a couple of my sisters, after I had mentioned (casually I thought) what I had given up one too many times for his liking. His words had a sobering effect, and now I look back on them and how I acted with that sinking feeling of shame (it should be noted that there’s also a healthy amount of respect for my brother mixed in there). Now during Lent, I won’t shout about what I’ve given up. Instead, I try to live more like these verses from Matthew:

“Thus, when you give alms, sound no trumpet before you, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and the streets, that they may be praised by men.” 

 - Matthew 6:2

“But when you fast, anoint your head and wash your face, that your fasting may not be seen by men but by your Father who is in secret;” 

- Matthew 6:17-18

I know I don’t manage it all the time – when someone brings up The Lent Conversation, I do still get sucked in as we all discuss what we’re giving up and how hard it is etc. Those discussions can be quite fun (!) and sometimes can help me reflect on how I’m really doing awfully little in the grand scheme of things, but often they turn a bit a self congratulatory, which is not the point of Lent. Perspective is good, pride is not!

6 Charity Doesn’t Cost A Thing

by Megan James

For me, as a student, the ‘almsgiving’ part of Lent for the past few years has been a little put on the back burner. I think for a long time I believed the lie that I just didn’t have anything to spare, that I had nothing to give, so instead, I would just have to fast extra and pray extra hard. However, last Lent I learnt that this is simply not true. I witnessed so many of my wonderful friends give so much, without spending a penny, and it made me realise this: Almsgiving is not just about financial charity (of course this is great), but instead, it is about giving in the simplest way; it’s about love. Charity is love. So instead of me looking towards my purse this Lent, I’m going to dig a little deeper (although, to find some money, I’d have to dig pretty deep right now…) There are so many other ways to spread love; washing a housemates dishes for them, that shows love. Sitting down and writing a letter to a friend, that shows love. Giving away those clothes you just never wear any more, that’s love too.These small acts of kindness go a long way. So, if your bank account is quivering at the thought of Lent, fear not; to give Alms is to give what you have, in any way that you can, and it's doing it with love.

‘Charity and love are the same – with charity you give love, so don’t just give money, but reach out your hand instead.’ – St Teresa of Calcutta

The Leeds Retreat : Rooted

By Paddie Denton

The retreats that we get to be part of are wonderful things, but they are often described as a mountaintop experience. Leaving that retreat, it can often feel like we are sliding down the side of the mountain, waiting for our next chance to climb back to God. However, Rooted felt a bit different.

Life can seem to be heading towards the destination, looking for the end and the celebration that comes with that (the mountaintop). To others it's 'not about the destination, but the journey' (the traveling up the mountain). But after this retreat I feel much more excited about the start, about beginnings.

And Rooted feels like a beginning. The start of a journey, and of some exciting things.

1) The mission at Leeds Trinity University

To say I was excited that the Youth 2000 Leeds retreat had moved to my old university campus is an understatement, and it was a brilliant change. The chapel felt made for the retreat, and it already felt like the retreat had been there for years. But it has also inspired something beyond what happened in the chapel. That weekend, the campus had a vibrant, energetic and loving example of the faith and the conversations that have started there and that continue are something miraculous.

2) Just pray

I don't know quite what it was but the talk on prayer this weekend was especially motivational and a real stand-out for me. This is probably because Mother Winsome basically summed it up as, 'stop thinking about it and just pray'. Apparently, this was just the slap in the face I needed. Simple.

3) New Relationships

It would be nice to say that just before Valentines it was that sort of relationship that I had started, but no such luck. What did start were new friendships among so many new first timers, (which helped lead to great conversations) alongside the rekindling of old friendships.


Like I said, this did not feel like the mountaintop to me, who knows why, because I felt as alive with faith as I normally do at a retreat. But this feels very much like the start of a new and exciting chapter for the Youth 2000 community and for the people we met at Leeds.

When a tree grows, it first establishes its roots, that's how everything else starts, and Rooted felt just like that. This weekend I felt we re-established ourselves back in the growth that God provides, through wisdom, love and support. And after Rooted I am excited to see that growth.

 It feels to me that the peak hasn't' been reached, that this retreat was more about getting us ready to flourish in the world. Right now, I don't think it's time to roll down from the mountaintop. Now feels like the perfect time to start.

Valentines and the problem with #relationshipgoals

By Sarah Morton

Is it just me, or does nothing we do quite seem good enough? I tidy my house and it looks great. Then I log into Pinterest and lose myself in photos of '#housegoals'. My husband prepares me a wonderful dinner, then I log onto Facebook and see someone prepared something that probably earned a Michelin Star '#foodgoals'. I get my hair done, go to upload a selfie on Instagram, only to see a model rocking it better ’#hairgoals'. It’s unending… Squad goals. Gym goals. And the one I predict we’re about to see in abundance over the next few days; relationship goals. 

Valentine’s Day is fast approaching, and with it, will come a flood of posts on social media highlighting what constitutes a successful relationship, one to aim for and aspire towards. I expect to see roses, blue Tiffany bags, heart shaped boxes of chocolates, maybe some romantic Paris engagements, and plenty of #boydidgood’s. 

Is this relationship goals then? 

I used to think so. 

I also didn’t used to like myself very much. I didn’t used to be very happy. But it was ok because I was going to get a boyfriend and he would complete me and I’d never worry about anything again. 

And then I did get a boyfriend. He could make me laugh like I’d never laughed before, and he loved me so much I felt like the luckiest girl in the world. But I still didn’t like myself very much, and I still had sad days and nights where I cried myself to sleep. But, ok, I was sure that when we get engaged, THEN he’d complete me and I’d never worry about anything ever again. 

And then we got engaged. We planned the most beautiful wedding, and began to create a life together. But still, I could be so, so sad. Could I really convince myself that getting married would mean I’d never worry about anything ever again? 

The ‘goals’ I had set for my relationship were unrealistic, and unfair. The demands and expectations I had put on my boyfriend before I even met him were ones he could never meet, no matter how hard he tried. I had been so fixated on finding a boyfriend for so long to complete myself, that I totally missed the part about how only God can complete me… awks. 

The catechism states quite clearly, that:

'the desire for God is written in the human heart, 

because man is created by God and for God; 

and God never ceases to draw man to himself. 

Only in God will he find the truth and happiness he never stops searching for.'

So, if it is in God that we find truth and happiness, why do we rely so much on people? Why do we put so much responsibility on, not just boyfriends/girlfriends/spouses, but our friends and family too? Of course, without forming human relationships, we would live very lonely lives indeed, but I’m sure many of us have experienced that feeling of helplessness when asked by a friend for advice. We aren’t supposed to carry our crosses alone, yet we also can’t expect someone else to carry our load when it gets too much either. People are not perfect. People don’t have the ability to take your fears and anxieties away. 

It is God, and God alone, who can help take the weight of your burdens. If I had put more time and energy into my relationship with God, allowing Him into my heart, laying down my problems at His feet, taking the time to pray into my sadness, my load would have seemed easier to bear for sure.

Getting into a relationship won’t solve your problems. 

A 'good' relationship comes when you know yourself. When you really know yourself; your weaknesses, your strengths, admitting your failures, accepting your triumphs. The ability to do this, though, comes through really knowing God. Which can be HARD. Sometimes, God doesn’t reply as quickly as that boy or girl on Facebook. God doesn’t work in our time, God works in His own time. But He does work, and He longs for us to know Him, just like, as Blaise Pascal wrote, we long for Him (whether we know it or not!); 

'There is a God shaped vacuum in the heart of every man, 

which cannot be filled by any created thing, 

but only by God, the Creator, made known by Jesus.'

Many people mistakenly see this longing for love as a desire for the love between two people, but that loneliness can only be filled by God himself. Us millennials live in a world where God is generally not regarded as Love. Love, on that social media surface, appears to be doing whatever you like with whoever is going to look best in your filtered Instagram photos. That’s what the ‘goal’ seems to be. 

As Catholics, we’re lucky. We know the truth. We know that God is Love, God is Love as the beautiful hope-bringing baby in the manger, and God is Love on the bloody, painful crucifixion on the hill. We know that we can’t have the joy of the resurrection without that bloody, painful crucifixion. 

Love, and relationships, aren’t everything you see on the internet. Love is something more, something beautiful, but messy. There is no such thing as a “relationship goal” in that sense, because every couple you see are carrying their own individual crosses, and working out how to carry them side by side. What we can strive for, however, whether in a relationship or not, is that closeness to God, where we are able to share some of the weight of our struggles with Him. 

#realrelationshipgoals

Fear of the future & Perspective : What St. John of The Cross and Kanye taught me

By Kirsten Brown

There’s a strange meditative state of mind which accompanies final year.

Some are apprehensive about leaving the security of a student lifestyle and starting a 9-5. Others are even more apprehensive about not having yet found a 9-5. Some seriously reconsider and change their career/academic choices, whilst others are just too burnt out or confused to make a choice. What's true for all is that, at some point, each person goes through waves of self doubt. I certainly did, and you will too. 

Whenever I find myself in need of some headspace I turn to a couple of age-old friends: prayer and music. 

A lot of my prayer life this year has been spent meditating on the writings of St. John of the Cross — letting his words and his life inspire me. Most of the time I was led to deeply ponder the type of person I wanted to be and accepting that — as I grew intellectually and spiritually — my dreams had probably changed. That realisation was both terrifying and inspiring. If I’m honest, planning out a rigid 10- year-life-plan is more about the comfort of security than fully knowing that I am where I am meant to be. 

St John’s words challenged me to change this. I asked God to show me how my time at university — the joy I found in my subject, the hardships, insights, intellectual challenges, friendships, spiritual experiences — could be used in the world, but in the way he wanted. What could I do with all I’d learnt that someone else couldn’t? Because it’s not about dismissing the experiences you’ve had — these are gifts meant for you — its about perspective.

This, I found, was the starting point — a kind of spiritual and practical emptiness. From this processes of ‘letting go’ room is made for The Spirit to work, to expose what the conscious mind (too noisy and busy most days) can’t usually hear. 

“If a man wishes to be sure of the road he’s traveling on, 

then he must close his eyes and travel in the dark.”

St. John of the Cross

A lot of the time I felt the pressure of deciding exactly the type of person I would be, during university. Yet the truth is that this decision may be just be pressure. Just because something appears good doesn’t mean that it’s right. Coming from the safe framework of high-school, the complete freedom of university, most of the time, feels like free-falling. The uncertainty and doubt about serious decisions can feel endless. But if we enter the uncertainty, keeping our gaze Christ-centred, without a doubt we start to understand that it’s not about finding this ‘one thing’ and then we can start living, but, instead, that we all have gifts and talents which can be used right now, where we are. I discovered that university was not about receiving a tool-box: you are the tool-box, it’s about learning how to be yourself. 

I really felt this hit home recently, finishing my last exam (ever) I rediscovered my love for Kanye West’s 'College Dropout' album. Don’t let the title put you off — yes he did dropout but what his stories tell are some hard hitting truths about the reality of expectation and perspective, which I wish I had known throughout university. So here’s to hoping that they can help. 

Perspective really is everything. Your definition of success, your goals and what you are willing to work hard for will most definitely change throughout your youth. There will be a point where you wonder why on earth you’re doing this to yourself. So remember: all you sow today is to bless tomorrow in the reaping. When things appear to be falling down, keep your gaze Christ-centred, and trust that all your experience will be used to bless someone else, one day. But also be honest when things aren’t working out, and never be afraid to ask for help!

We are ALL self-conscious. It's known that you can literally recreate your entire personality at uni. This can be a great fresh start, but also a risk which results in an identity crisis. The key is to find friends who love and find worth in who you are, so that you can learn to love yourself irrespective of your social life, your finances, your faults or whatever. Learning to know yourself, to love yourself and to be compassionate to yourself now is going to be crucial for when you enter ‘the real world’. Then you can be sensitive to others struggling around you. 

Fear of failing only holds you back. It is SO easy to coast through life at a complacent level because of others expectations and our own fear of trying. Most of us hate feeling embarrassed or vulnerable — yet it is in these moments that we discover our unique creativity. God calls us ‘beyond the boat’ to make ourselves vulnerable so that he can show us something beyond our own potential. God is calling you to step out in courage, faith and trust — his plan just may not be the same as yours or even one the world can foresee. But there is a plan. Being vulnerable allows us to go beyond complacency and seek answers in new ways, in new places, always being open. 

Finally, ground yourself in faith. Grounding yourself in prayer and faith during the good times builds a foundation for low periods, and actually allows you to emerge stronger than before. Your deepest trials will one day be your greatest testimonies.